Day 12

If you find this, please share my story.

Two weeks ago, we were fine. Then they said an asteroid was going to kill us all. Panic, obviously. What else? They said they’d try to shoot it out of the sky, like some stupid Hollywood summer hit. I don’t think it’s going to happen, though. That’s why I’m in a bunker with a strange girl. We decided we are going to survive.

I’m not recording the daily rituals anymore. If you’re seeing this, you get it. We gathered water. We gathered food. We found some tools. I stole some car batteries. There’s not much else to say.

Today I learned that the girl has been saving the apple cores and was planning on keeping the seeds so we can grow new trees after the world’s finished ending. That’s when I lost it again. I broke down crying. Why didn’t I think of that? It hit me that I was certainly going to die without her. I wanted to survive long enough to outlast word devastation. She was planning on surviving long after that. Of course we needed to keep the seeds! We need food after we survive!

Today was the first time I had a hug in a long while. He and I had been growing apart for several months before he left. I hadn’t had anyone in so long, I sort of just fell into the girl’s arms and cried. She cried with me. Yes, I think this is when I decided I could really trust her. We composed ourselves and went back into survival mode.

We split up again. She went to one farmhouse for food, and I went to another. I found plenty before moving onto another house. There were three men – raiders – and they knew I was here. But like a dumb sitcom, I ran outside in a panic and stepped on a rake. Exactly like a dumb sitcom! It hit me in the face. My forehead was bleeding.

One of the raiders was upon me in an instant, but he stopped. He told me to play dead and smeared my blood onto his bat. He told his buddies that I was dead. I think he wanted them to leave me alone. They wanted to do something else and everyone got into a scuffle. Some awful things were shouted, and I heard some very sickening noises. In an instant, two men were dead. The last man had an axe and he was coming for me.

I was going to die. I was sure of it. I jumped up and grabbed the bat from the body of the man who had tried to protect me. He must have seriously thought I was dead based on the look of surprise.

No, I’m not recording more on that. I killed a man today. He was going to-

The girl was scared when I came home. Scared of me? Or what happened to me? I was covered in my own blood, and the blood of the man. I must have looked crazy. The girl didn’t want to come near me, and I didn’t want her anyway. I undressed and poured an entire jug of water over me, and broke down for the second time today.

We ate in silence. I brought home food. So did she. But we didn’t speak at all. I felt her eyes on me the whole time. Am I as bad as the raiders? I killed a man. It was self-defense, right?